Just put in my two weeks notice at my job. Literally, 9 minutes ago. As one might imagine, having a tough time focusing. Its amazing how a step like that changes things. Right? Topics tend to surface that weren't there 10 minutes before the conversation. They scroll across your brain like a news ticker at the bottom of the TV giving updates on the hurricane ravaging the eastern seaboard. The, "what the heck did I just do?" came and went. "You're only at 30% support raised, idiot!" was another highlight. The problem with the news ticker is it works on a loop so the words are destined to come back for a second round and then a third and so on and so forth. One thing to mention, just like the news ticker, there always comes a snippet of good news, "the coast guard rescues family of five off roof trapped by flood waters." For me that came in form of a tremendous burden being lifted off my shoulders. The pending conversation with my manager was weighing on me like like an anvil. In your mind you picture it like the perfect storm. In reality you realize the other person is also human and understands our desires to find our calling. Even if the faith aspect isn't there. The basic human desire to find purpose is shared by everyone. I'm sure the news ticker will continue to roll on for awhile. Eventually tapering off as I allow the hurricane of fears and emotions to be covered by God's reassuring faithfulness. Even in the midst of all of this I feel a calm presence. The facts of the story haven't changed. I've been called by God to take this step. My humanly faith will waiver based on my emotions and circumstances, but God's calling to obedience will not. Through obedience I'll finally place myself in a position where I'm capable of believing. Placing myself in a place where God will ignite the faith I've allowed to live dormant in my heart for a long time.